Men I Would Never Date

The other day I found myself baking brownies and cookies just for the hell of it. It took me all day, but not to worry cause I had nothing else to do.
This may be a huge indicator that I need to get a date, a man, or just laid, but I look for quality over quantity.

And there is some shit I can just not tolerate such as:

A man who is obviously hungry when he approaches me, i.e.: "You look good enough to eat," "Aren't you young and fresh" Do I look like a fucking chicken wing to you? Take your ass to Harold's with that crap.

A man who takes a step aerobics class: Honey, when you swivel better than me we have a problem.

A man that was enlisted in the military before I made my trip through my mom's ovaries: Hey asshole! Yeah, you over there. If your birthyear doesnt start with a 7 or an 8, get the hell up out of my face and go collect your SSI before it disappears...bastard.