Move, Bitch. Get Out the Way.

Buhster here, trying not to get arrested for assault. Read on to find out why...

When I was a kid, I used to think that adults were assholes because when I'd be walking down the street or in the mall towards them, they wouldn't move. I thought that they figured since I was the kid that I was the one who had to move out of the way.

Now that I'm an adult (sort of), I realize that the reason they were doing this was to avoid the inevitable bob and weave that people do when trying to get past each other. It makes much more sense to stay the course and let the other person move around you.

Last night, however, I encountered a miscellaneour who clearly didn't understand the idea of the other person staying in one place. The worst part about it was that she was one of my kind - a runner.

So I'm standing at an intersection waiting for the walk light, and I see a runner waiting across the street. When the light turns, I start walking and see that she's starting the bob and weave. So, as a fellow runner, I stop because it's easier for me to do so. I gave her a good 3 feet to decide which direction to go around me without worrying about my moving.


Yet, for some odd reason, this bitch thought she was Muhammad Ali and kept bobbing and weaving and eventually found herself directly in front of me. She stopped right there, threw her hands up in a rage and sighed, "Ugh!"

Hey, Miscellaneour! My ass was standing still like a fucking light pole, and it was obvious from 3 feet away that I wasn't moving. What the hell are you ugh-ing at me for? How bout you take your stupid ass off the road and stop giving the rest of us runners a bad name.

Next time...I throw some bows.