The Joys of Quitting

No one told me it would be this wonderful. I find myself doing the happy dance and bursting out into the chorus of George Michael’s “Freedom” 3-4 times per day.

The best things about quitting are:

1.Deleting e-mails that could save your ass in a crisis, because your ass no longer needs saving

2. Answering your phone only if you feel like it

3. Being late and leaving early knowing there’s no consequences

4.Throwing away full file folders without going through their content (and making lots of noise as you do so)

5.Telling your boss what assignments you just aren’t going to get to in the next two weeks

6.The fleeting look of jealously that passes through everyone’s eyes when you tell them

7.The promise of working with people who may actually be normal and good at their jobs

8.Making a mental note of everyone you will absolutely not miss and never plan on seeing again

9. Declining all meeting notices without giving an explanation

10.Writing cryptic messages on the underside of your desk in permanent black marker to warn the next poor sap