Domino Effect Asshole
It's true that you should always be a leader and not a follower. But it's human nature to gauge the behavior of other human beings and copy what they're doing. However, because the world runs amuck with assholes (at last count there were at least 1.2 billion, grade A certified assholes in the world) we cannot always trust them. The following is a list of what I like to call the "domino effect" assholes who make us all look stupid:
-The guy who starts running down/up the stairway to the train, making everyone behind him start to run (of course, the train he hears is going in the wrong direction and/or isn't your train anyways)
-The guy you follow to the other grocery store line 'cause he makes you think it's moving faster (it never, ever is)
-The guy you follow down the unfamiliar street cause he looks like he might know where he's going (he is just as lost as you)
-The guy driving the car who seems like he is heading to the nearest freeway ramp (dude, trust me he's not)
-The guy who stands at the front of the bus during rush hour knowing full and well that it's soon going to be packed with assholes who won't go past him to fill up the standing room in the back of the bus
-The guy at a fast food restaurant who finds new ways to shove his trash into a completely full garbage can or just simply places it on top of or around it
-The guy who decides not to ignore the funnel line to get to cashiers and instead hops in right behind someone who looks to be almost done with their transaction
-The guy who slows down to look at the scene of an accident, look at a guy changing his tire, look at a guy who stopped on the side of the road to take a piss, therefore causing other cars to slow down and resulting in a major jam for no reason.
posted by Miss Misc @ 7:39 PM
2 comments
2 Comments:
a few others:
* asshole who stands on the left side of the escalator. stand on the right, walk on the left, it's not hard to figure out. this was a severe issue in dc, as all metro stations require rides on long-as-fuck escalators to enter and exit the stations, as well as the 3.7 drooling tourists that these escalators serve daily. and DO NOT give me a filthy look when i walk on the left, get behind you, and say "excuse me." MOVE.
* asshole who stands on the people mover sidewalk at the airport (and, typically, blocks all ways around him out of sheer ignorance to his surroundings and a profound lack of self-awareness). you can only stand if your suitcase is too heavy to carry and doesn't have wheels (question: why would you use it if it was too heavy to carry and doesn't have wheels?). please do not tell me that you're so goddamn lazy that you can't even walk to your gate.
* the sudden-stopper on a packed sidewalk. usually seen in the summer on michigan avenue, this person will stop directly in front of you so that they can point at a building with more than four floors, consult their map, or stop to debate whether they should eat at the cheesecake factory or tgi friday's. they do not notice or care that people with real jobs are trying to get there (or escape) without accidentally stepping on their children, who should probably be leashed, or on them, lest i harm your momjean shorts (mom jorts) and fanny pack.
* also, the dumbfucks who crowd the back door of the bus, even though their stop isn't for another 10 minutes, and keep clutching the pole when the bus is at a complete stop, not allowing people to pass them and exit. if you're that neurotic, i have no idea why you're in public to start with.
Excellent additions
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