Asshole of the Day

"Do you need a ride?" Guy

Sigh, this one was tough to nominate since they usually have good intentions, but this public service announcement goes out to all the men who have offered me rides home in the past month and seem genuinely surprised when I keep on walking.

Let me break it down for you fellas:

-I don't know you. The name you just gave me could be an alias, possibly the stolen identity of the man's body you have in the trunk of your SUV (it's always an SUV.)

-Driving down the street slowly and yelling at me from the window is annoying and scary.

-You want me to get into your car and strap myself in with a strong piece of elastic meant to restrain me from being able to get out of the vehicle quickly.

-You want me to tell you where I live.

-You're usually not attractive either...not that it affects my decision to accept the ride...much

So Many Assholes, So Little Time

Damn. I have discovered that total and utter misery makes you totally unproductive. Note that since me and Buhster have become beyond disgruntled, we've stopped posting because we consider the whole world to be assholes, thus making it too much of an effort to keep up with Les Misc's Asshole of the Day.

However, I will attempt to think back and come up with highlights from the last few week:

1. Both of my bosses are supremo assholes. As I walked up to them to ask a question, they stopped talking, looked totally guilty, and pasted on smiles. Gee, I thought we were out of high school. They then proceeded to not answer my question.

2. Offices on different time zones: Dear West Coast office: you cannot make a request at 3pm PST for something you'd like by EOD. Cause guess what, by the time we get your request (which is always something that could have waited until the next day) it's already EOD for us. Thanks for keeping me at the office until 8pm on a Friday night bitches.

3. The Super Bitch who won't admit it: I don't know about you, but I can respect a person who embraces their inner asshole and let's it shine through proudly. What I can't respect is someone who acts like they're super nice, then flips the script on you like Jekyll and Hyde.

Asshole of the Day As Chosen By Phukker

All of Us

This is sad.

We want the day to be over and it just started. Remember hating that the street lights went on, cause that was the beginning of the end. Now at the beginning we wish for the day to just end, to get all of the drudgery over with, so we can really get on with our lives. What happened to those kids who couldn't wait for the sun to rise, who had a great time hanging out on neighborhood stoops, jumping rope, playing house, hide and go seek, freeze tag? All day long, even when we didn't have anything to do we still didn't want it to just end. We did want to be big though, so we could do what we wanted to do, go where we wanted to go, and stay out past those street lights going on. Now that we are big, we don't care about playing, discovering and just hanging out. We want to get inside before those orbs light the street, to get ready for another day of let's just get this over with. So we are the assholes of the day, for forgetting, and letting all of the miscellaneous get us down.